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Emotions & cancer
Cancer has emotional effects that may last for some time. Often it might seem like an emotional roller coaster ride when you’re diagnosed. Throughout treatment and afterwards you may be reminded of your cancer because of changes to your lifestyle and body.
Getting professional help to deal with your emotions may be helpful. Call Cancer Council Helpline 13 11 20 to talk about your options. The information on these pages is part of the booklet Emotions and cancer, and covers the following topics. You might feel angry with family, friends, yourself and your doctors. Anger is a natural reaction to the interruption that cancer causes. Don’t feel guilty about your thoughts or moods. Don’t blame yourself – we don’t usually know the cause of your particular cancer. Everyone reacts differently. Your fear, anger and guilt may only last a few days or a few weeks. It is hard – but don’t lose hope. The outlook for many cancers is constantly improving with some cancers being cured, while others can be controlled. Living with cancer and its treatment can be frightening. What you hope for may change along the way. Letting other people know what is happening to you can help you through difficult times. You don’t have to face it alone, or worry about hiding your feelings. You need support – try not to shut others out. Tips for telling others
Your children may also need reassurance that your illness isn’t their fault. If they don’t know what’s wrong, they can imagine the worst, fell left out or angry. What and how much to tell children depends on their ages. If you don’t feel up to it, ask your doctor or a trusted friend or relative to help. Find out more
Helping children cope
Children can find the changes that come with cancer diagnosis and treatment difficult. How they react will depend on their age. Young children may become insecure and want to be close to you all the time, or behave badly to get attention.
Tips
Only you can decide when you’re ready to talk about your feelingsand to whom you share them with. It’s OK to tell people you’re not ready to talk and that you’d rather wait for another time. Sometimes you might want to be alone. If you would like more company, or people to talk to who have had similar experiences, a support group may help or call Cancer Council Helpline 13 11 20 for information about our Cancer Connect program. Cancer is difficult for everyone affected by it – your friends and family included. They might feel uncomfortable because they don’t know what to say and they may be worried about how you will react and what to do if you cry. Remember that other people need to express their feelings too. They may have the same fears and anxieties and need as much information as you do. Or they may feel angry. Let people know if their behaviour upsets you. It may help you, or them, to talk to a counsellor, or someone outside your immediate circle. Most people will want to support you – they just may not know how to. They may wonder if you want company or to be left alone, to talk about your cancer or not. When they say ‘Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help' – tell how they can best help you. Your friends still care about you, even if they stay away. They may not be able to cope with their feelings or know how to respond to a change in appearance. Here are some suggestions as to how you can help. If you would like to talk to someone, call Cancer Council Helpline 13 11 20. Support services - find out about our education programs, support groups, counselling, practical assistance
Cancer - how are you travelling? Understanding the emotional and social impact of cancer from the National Breast and Ovarian Cancer Centre
American Cancer Society > see Coping with physical and emotional changes
CancerBackup UK > see Resources and support National Cancer Institute > see Cancer topics, then Coping with cancer  Top |
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Info & support 
